


Voices I Play With In My Head

by Sam_Haine



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asgard (Marvel), Exile, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Jötunheimr | Jotunheim, King Thor (Marvel), Loki (Marvel)-centric, M/M, Minor Jane Foster/Thor, Miðgarðr | Midgard, Pre-Loki/Thor, Shameless Smut, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2019-07-08 14:10:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15932057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sam_Haine/pseuds/Sam_Haine
Summary: When Odin reveals Loki's true heritage, Thor doesn't know what to make of it. He's confused because they've grown up hating the Frost Giants of Jotunheim ever since birth. It's even worse for Loki who doesn't know who he is anymore. What'll happen to the brothers after this revelation?





	1. Exile

**Author's Note:**

> So, this idea has been in my head for a while because I've always wanted to explore Thor from Thor 1 and his reaction to Loki being a Jötun since Thor in the first installment of the trilogy was ignorant, arrogant and rash about everything. So, if he seems mean it's an adaptation of his character from part 1. This is a Loki centric fic and there are more tags to be added.

Exile 

 

The sun is just about to set, spreading a rainbow of golds, pinks and oranges across the cloudy sky. 

Beneath a golden tree, with leaves akin to those of the magic forest of Shirn, lie two brothers. One is pale and pure where the other is tan and brawny. And one maintains silky golden strands while the other keeps a short black and silky mane. They're enjoying the evening sun by the river Temp, it's ebbing surface shining silver like thousands of fish swimming downstream. The raven-haired Prince is lying curled up on the blonde one's chest, nose pressed into his neck with his eyes closed. 

The millionth golden leaf falls. 

"Will you make reading mandatory when you become king?" Loki asks softly, the mischief clear in his voice. He grins to himself as Thor's fingers prod playfully at his scalp before carding gently through his hair again. 

"Perhaps I should make training mandatory for all those who read too much." Thor responds cheekily, an arm around Loki's slight waist. His little brother giggles playfully, breathing soft and slow against his jaw. 

"Okay, I concede. But you really should encourage it brother." Loki presses, twirling a blonde lock around his finger. 

Thor chuckles, a deep, rumbling sound that pleases Loki more than it should. 

"What is it with you and these feminine habits dear brother? Men fight, leave the reading to the witches."

"I'm not a witch I'm a sor-"

"A sorcerer, right. Like there's a difference." Thor teases stroking Loki's face tenderly. 

"There _is._ And men don't only fight although it is a necessary skill. I'm simply suggesting a diversity in the daily lives of our people." Loki protests, trying not to smile from his brother's gentle petting. He fails miserably. 

Thor sighs as they put a little space between them. Loki's head is still on his chest. 

"Okay, I shall take your suggestions into consideration. But first, we must deal with the Frost Giants." 

Loki frowns. "Are they acting up again?" 

Thor nods. "Father is trying to be diplomatic about it, but he says they're itching for a war. With Laufey dead, the new King, Leifet is anxious to take revenge for the invasion." 

"But- ...but Asgard invaded Jotunheim back then because they were enslaving innocent Xandarians. It was wrong of Laufey to do so." 

Thor sighs heavily as if already weighted with his duties of King even though the ceremony was tomorrow. 

"Not everyone has the same idea of what is wrong and what is right my sweet brother. The Frost Giants will have their war sooner than they wish for if they keep sending threats." 

Loki mews sadly, curling up deeper into Thor's body, their legs crossing over each other. 

"Those horrid monsters. Why can't they just stop fighting? The conflict isn't good for either of us." 

Thor tightens his hold on his brother, feverishly protective of him now; his innocence and his sanity. 

"Not to worry brother. Under my reign they will cease being a hindrance to the Nine Realms. I won't let anything happen to you." He promises, kissing Loki's forehead as if to solidify his words. His brother purrs delightedly, batting away at a golden leaf that had fallen gracefully onto Thor's hair. 

"I love you." 

And in that tender moment, neither brother ever believed that in just a few hours, each of their worlds would come crashing down in flames. 

................

Double-crossed. 

It wasn't quite the right term for what was happening right now but... it seemed damn near accurate. 

Loki's pretty sure he's never been blindsided before in his life; so when it actually happens to him, the feeling leaves him reeling like a hard kick to the ribs. 

He'd finally come of age- _they'd_ finally come of age where one of them could ascend the throne and- 

...and Odin chose Thor. 

Of course, _that_ was no surprise at all since Thor was the eldest and it would make sense for him to lead while Loki would stand court by his brother's side. Hel, Loki had been waiting for this day to come for years, knowing that he'd one day ascend when his brother could no longer lead Asgard. Or even better, he never truly craved the throne of Asgard, but rather loved the idea of spending his life at Thor's side, ruling Asgard together. 

But none of these things were what had blindsided him. 

No. 

It was the words Od- the Allfather had just uttered to him and Thor in the vacated throne room. He could immediately feel the room grow colder, the emptiness in Odin's eyes much too horrible to bear. He feels himself gasp- can feel when he takes an involuntary step back in shock- but he cannot come to terms with the facts. It's suddenly as if he'd been thrust into some terrifying nightmare where everyone hated him for some inexplicable reason. 

_'Your true parentage, is of the Frost Giants of Jotunheim.'_

He hears the words but cannot fathom their implications. 

_This is why you can never ascend the throne of Asgard.'_

They echo in his head- the words- but he suddenly feels lightheaded and dizzy. His breath comes out in shallow pants but they're not enough. He vaguely notices Thor standing stock still beside him but he doesn't see much else. His eyes burn with tears as his chest bursts from the pain but it doesn't stop. Mother- he needed his mother but his heart clenches again as he recalls that Frigga had long passed, her spirit resting somewhere in the rolling fields of Valhalla.

"Wh- ...ho- how could you not _tell_ me?" He sobs, right hand clutching his stomach as if he'd throw up if he let go. As tears spring to his eyes, he wonders why his face feels cold to the touch instead of hot with shame and embarrassment. But then Odin speaks again and his words are just as icy as they are sharp. 

"I found you, as a baby, cast out onto an icy rock in Jotunheim. You had already been abandoned by your own herd- your own father, Laufey... so I decided to take you in with the hope that one day, we would be able to reunite the two realms. But with the tensions and conflict worsening, I can now see that _that_ is no longer possible." 

_"Laufey's son..."_

Loki feels the pit of his stomach collapse, like some felled building foundation inside him. His skin grows hot then cold, and then stays that way. 

"So- ...so what now? Wh- what are you going to do with me now that I am no longer of use for your political gains?" He demands angrily, his anger now grasping hold of him. He's hurt and confused but it's nothing compared to the rage he feels building and worsening with every word that comes out of Odin's mouth. Thor still hasn't said a single word and Loki's not sure whether that's a good thing or not. He and his brother had always been close, sharing everything between them and then some. They'd been inseparable since Loki had known himself but now... now he feels miles away. 

"You are of course welcome to stay here, it has become your home-"

"But not my true home." He interjects, his teeth gritted and his voice shaky. This was Odin's way of kicking him out; out of the kingdom, out of the family he'd never truly belonged to and out of their lives. 

"You were raised with just as much love as Thor. Frigga loved you-"

"But you don't." 

"I took you from the brink of death an-"

"And subjected me to a lifetime of lies." 

"You were an innocent child-"

"But now with the war waging, you see me differently. Don't you?" 

The pause that Odin takes tells him all he needs to know and he'd be lying if he said it didn't hurt like hell. 

"You could have told me what I was. From the very beginning, why didn't you?" He cries, his pained sobs echoing in the throne room that now seems to lack it's grandeur. Everything about this room seems different now. Or maybe it was just him that was changed, and the room had remained the same all this time. 

_"Tell me!"_ He screams finally triggering a reaction from Thor who notices Odin growing weaker by the second. 

"It wasn't of import n- now that you had a new pur- purpose..." Odin pants weakly, his eyes closing on him. He collapses to the floor, his back leaning against the throne with a hand reaching out to Thor who helps soften his fall. Loki's angry- Hel, he's _incensed_ but as Odin falls he takes a step forward to help only to be stopped by his brother.

"Don't." 

Loki pauses for a moment before moving to help again.

 _"Loki leave!"_ Thor roars at him and it has him shrinking back in abject fear and hurt. Tears fill his eyes but he doesn't dare let them show again. Instead, he turns swiftly and rushes out the room just as Thor calls the guards for help. 

He spends the rest of the night, locked up in his chambers, his royal leathers stripped off and thrown angrily at the floor. His pillow is soaked with the salt of his tears by the time moonrise has fallen. It sheds a frosty glow through his windows, setting his pale, naked skin alight with silver so that he looks like an ethereal being amidst dark green quilts. When he raises his head from his pillow, his eyes are sore and swollen from crying. He sniffles, getting up pathetically from his bed and trudging over to the full-length mirror on the wall. 

The eyes that gaze back at him are blood red and sorrowful. Filled with tears that seem to keep falling down his once beautiful face. Now, as he stews on the thought of himself as a Frost Giant, his skin takes on a bluish hue, ancient and intricate runes coming onto his skin like raised tattoos. His hair remains long, silky and black but his nails grow longer and his horns are small on his forehead but they're still there. A mournful cry escapes his throat as he collapses to his knees in front of the reflection that is not his own. 

He doesn't know _who_ he is anymore. 

 

...................

 

The throne room feels hollow now, as he steps into the doorway, his footsteps echoing out loud. 

He doesn't dare look at the golden walls for they would reflect his true nature. He hasn't dropped the blue skin, much too curious about how Thor would react to it. His brother hasn't said a single word to him after he'd chased him from this very room. Loki knows he can trust his brother though, and that they're as close as brothers should be- if not more. Thor had always had an extremely soft spot for his little brother, protecting him from his wild friends and the rest of the world. And Loki had enjoyed being Thor's little damsel in distress. 

He loved Thor. 

Odin lies back on a bed, shrouded in a vision of sparkly gold film. He's in the Odinsleep. Thor sits at his side, head in his hands as if he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders. And he rightfully _does._ He was now the King. And with Odin incapacitated by the Odinsleep, he would have no help in ruling the people. But Loki could help... he _had_ to. 

"I'll never get used to seeing him like this." 

Thor's head shoots up from his hands, blue eyes glaring daggers into Lo- 

"What the hel-" 

"I'm sorry." Loki apologises, the sincerity in his voice heartbreaking. He's wrapped in a thick green cloak, his Jötun skin glowing darkly in the golden light. Thor slowly gets to his feet, looking unsure... untrusting. Loki holds a hand out, to- ...he doesn't even know what he's trying to do. 

"I'm still _me_ brother. I'm still your little Loki." He tries to say with a small smile but the pain in his chest causes his smile to quiver, a telltale wetness flooding his red eyes. Thor's face is expressionless, unfazed and deeply conflicted. 

"Remove the cloak." He orders crudely, in a deep, roguish voice that has Loki stepping back a little. He begins to stammer out a confused "what?" but Thor growls at him, taking a threatening step forward. 

"Remove it. Now." 

The damned tear finally slips down his eyes as he looks down pitifully at himself. The cloak clings weakly to his body, as if it didn't even recognize him, as if it hated him. A sob escapes his lips as he shakes his head when Thor grabs him by the shoulders, his eyes unforgiving. His calloused hands handle Loki's fragile body roughly, yanking at the cloak. A dark blue hand grabs Thor's wrists to stop him, to beg for mercy but Thor growls at him, forcing him to halt. The minute Loki resigns himself, Thor rips the cloak off his body. 

He hates the way his brother stares at him, like he's some kind of Bilgesnipe, or common rodent. Like something he'd just like to crush under his boot with disdain. Loki looks away in hopes of not having to see the look of pure revulsion on Thor's face but Thor grabs him by the neck, pulling him close. He squeaks out in shock, blue hands scraping at Thor's for him let go. 

"St- uh! Thor stop!" He chokes, but Thor snarls at him, throwing him to the floor. His bare skin collides with the floor but it doesn't scratch or tear or bleed. It's tough like the Frost Giants of Jotunheim. And it's cold as ice as his hands reach out to brace his fall. Frosty daggers shoot from the tips of his fingers, Thor stepping out of the way just in time to miss one of the dangerous icicles. He rounds on Loki, grunting in surprise as his brother reaches out a hand in surrender. 

"I meant you no harm brother!" He gasps, reaching for his cloak to conceal his modesty. 

"I am not your brother." Thor snarls mercilessly, practically tearing at the bruises of his already torn heart. Loki's face- his entire being in fact, crumples like a falling building, a metaphor for his life if there was any. He struggles to his feet, wrapping the cloak around him haphazardly. He closes his eyes and manifests his magic, his blue skin shimmering out of existence as his pale skin returns. His eyes are bright and green again and his lips are soft and pink. Thor's eye twitches at the illusion and he shakes his head frustratedly. 

"I was your brother yesterday." Loki says softly, his voice heavy with an agony that won't cease. 

"Do you remember none of that? Don't you remember us, down by the river... under that tree when you told me that you loved me. And that- that you'd never let anything happen to me. Brother, _please."_

He can see a flicker of _something_ flash across Thor's eyes- a moment of sympathy maybe. Or a moment to decide whether or not he could grant his once brother a small mercy. Loki was willing to accept any and all of it. He wanted- no... _needed_ Thor to be there for him, right now when Odin had so crassly revealed his true heritage to him. He needed a shoulder to cry on, and Thor's solid body against his; holding him, caressing him... reassuring him that everything was going to be okay and that he was not the monster he'd believed himself to be. 

"Thor-" He starts again, taking a steady step towards his... his brother? Were they even close like that anymore? 

"It doesn't matter that we were raised together. You are a Frost Giant and of Jotunheim. You don't belong here and if you had the intelligence you've always prided yourself on, you will leave... And never come back." 

A flash of alarm surges through Loki and he shakes his head desperately. 

"Brother no-!"

"Father is in the Odinsleep and I am King now. I command you to leave Asgard, _Jötun_." Thor demands, the Alpha in his voice bellowing across the room just as thunder cracks across the skies, sparks of blue lightning emitting from his fingertips. 

Loki can feel the weather change then, the darkened skies doing nothing to ease his shattered heart. The Thor that glares at him now isn't the brother he's grown up with all these centuries. Hel, _he_ wasn't the person he'd thought he was all this time. His heart yearns for a last ditch effort to try to plead with his br- with _Thor_ to see things differently but as the God raises his arm, hand out and open for Mjolnir, Loki knows it's too late. 

He's too late. 

He tucks tail and runs out of the room, his trail of tears behind him like reversed crumbs meant to lead out of the castle and far far away rather than a trail to follow home. 

 

....................

 

It's nightfall when Loki is done bundling up what he needs; his assorted daggers and all thirteen volumes of Frigga's leather bound notes on Seidr and foreign magic. 

He looks around at his empty chambers, the dark drapes now seemingly drab and dusty. His bed probably has the most cherished memories of him and Thor, sleeping together when he got scared of the harsh thunder and bright lightning. Or them simply camping out in his room when Odin had clearly given them orders to stay apart because they needed to study for lessons. An unfortunate smile forces itself onto his face but he quickly gets rid off it, much too heart broken to even breathe. Odin lied to him ever since he was a baby and now the only family he'd ever had, was lost. 

Kicked out like common trash. 

He leaves his double-horned helmet on the table at his bedside, it's golden gleam now a mockery of his title, once maintained with pride and glory, now a mere disgrace to his name. He was no longer Loki of Asgard, or an Asgardian Prince. He wasn't even Loki Odinson, forced to revert to his original title of Loki Laufeyson. Another tear slips down his face but he wipes at it viciously as he vacates his room, trudging down the empty halls of the castle. His plan was to leave through one of his secret passageways to the northern end of the structure. 

"My Prince." 

_Well, he did say "was."_

Heimdall steps out of the darkness, helmet and armor on, the Bifrost sword in his hands. He regards Loki with expressionless golden eyes, his mouth in a tight line. It takes Loki about three whole seconds to realize that Heimdall was the gatekeeper and had the power of his all-seeing eyes. He hangs his head in shame and weariness, much too drained to face Heimdall's judgement right now. 

"I am no longer a Prince of Asgard. But I'm sure you already know that." He says evenly, bracing himself emotionally to lose another person he'd known for his entire life. Heimdall doesn't speak for a while, regarding him quietly and then turning his eyes to the sky. 

"This is wrong." He finally says, voice grave as the others who now look at him with scorn. Loki feels his chest throb painfully again but he swallows it down. 

"I didn't want to trouble you to open the Bifrost. This is a much less conspicuous way out." He defends himself, hating the way his voice shakes. Heimdall actually looks surprised for a second. 

"I meant, it is wrong, what your brother is forcing you to do." He corrects, his brows drawn close. Loki, despite himself feels the need to come to Thor's defense. 

"He's not forcing me to do anythin-"

"He's exiled you, wrongfully. Forced you to leave Asgard." 

"I am the son of a Frost Giant." He chokes through gritted teeth, disappointed in the tears he swore he'd never let fall again. 

"Who's done nothing wrong. Loki, I can speak to Thor-" 

"No!" His outburst is met with an impatient grunt from the gatekeeper who shakes his head stubbornly. 

"Heimdall, you can't. Thor is King now, and whatever alliance you or anyone may form with me, would be considered treason. I can't- won't let you do that." 

The soft look that eases onto Heimdall's face makes Loki hurt even more but he strengthens his resolve. Here he thought the gatekeeper would have been ecstatic to have him gone but it seemed like Heimdall was his only friend. It confuses him for hed never been as close to the gatekeeper as Thor had been. He's always been attached to Frigga, and Frigga alone. At times both he and Thor would go play with Heimdall- bother him, it more seemed- but ever since he was a child, Loki always felt different. Like he didn't belong... 

Guess he didn't know how right he was.

"You never liked me. Why don't you act like it now?" He demands, his green eyes wet and red-rimmed. Heimdall has the grace to look disappointed... whether it was in himself or in Loki, he didn't know. But as the gatekeeper regards him, he notices the soft almost regretful look in his eyes. 

"Perhaps it was my fault if it seemed that I... never favoured you as much as I did Thor. But, loyalty to your father kept me from showing you the love and care you deserved. And for that, I am sorry." 

It's the redemption he never knew he needed, right in that moment when he felt so alone and rejected. His heart hurts and so does his throat with the effort it takes to keep from wailing out loud. He feels more tears flood his eyes, running down his face in hot streams. 

"Did you know? Wh- ...what I was, all along? Did- ...did you know?" He chokes, not even bothered to wipe away his tears. 

"Odin swore me to secrecy that I would never reveal what I saw. I am truly sorry Loki." Heimdall answers, defeated as he sighs heavily. Loki reels back only a little, feeling more like a fool that he was betrayed and lied to by the people he'd trusted. He still held some hope that maybe Thor would forgive him and would see past his heritage in the far future but... now as he stands alone with Heimdall, he doesn't believe any of it anymore. 

"I won't let him do this to y-" 

"No one lets Thor do anything." He says softly, the corner of his lips turning up fondly at the thought of his stupid, reckless brother. 

"He'll be a great King, I know it. I hope... I hope you can forgive me." 

"There is nothing to forgive, Loki, please don't do this." 

It's weird hearing the great gatekeeper of the Bifrost plead for his sake and his stomach churns at the sound. He's afraid if he stays in Asgard any longer, he'd just fall to his knees and beg their forgiveness. 

"Goodbye Heimdall." 

He's gone in a flash of gold and green... so suddenly that not even the great all-seer of Asgard could prepare for it.


	2. Somewhere I Belong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor has so many questions that he needs answered but Odin's not of much use in his sleep. Loki seeks out the only people who he thinks can help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I didn't think this would get much love but, you guys are awesome as always. More to come :)

Somewhere I Belong 

 

It's dark and cold where he's at, not unlike the feeling thudding deep inside his heart at the moment. 

His bright green eyes are now dull and his face is ashen as he arrives at the snowy plateau. He doesn't shiver despite the green, threadbare blouse he has on and the soft black slacks. His hair has become a mess of oil-black wires because of the frigid windstorm raging round the entire planet. He doesn't feel cold though... doesn't even shiver once now that his life had become one ice cold mess of lies and rejection. And try as he might, he can't get the image of Thor's angry face out of his head, nor can he erase the sound of his angry, thunderous voice banishing him from Asgard. 

Soft snowflakes fall into his head, making a dainty, white crown around his hair like some icy halo. He brushes them off as easily as they come, squinting his eyes to properly see the dark caves ahead. 

He's been here before. 

Some moonrises ago in fact; with his br- ...with _Thor._

It is a burden and a sharp knife to keep reminding himself that he no longer has a brother but he... _has to._ This was his life now; a solitary and shattered thing, mere memories of the times he'd had with people he now had to consider... strangers. A soft whimper escapes his lips as he enters the ice cave, it's massive arch overwhelming as he steps forward gingerly. He should be nervous- but he isn't... should be _terrified_ really but- ...he isn't.

Entering enemy territory was no small feat but he clung to the hope that maybe he'd come to the right place for some answers and maybe some... some reason to stay behind.

 _"You've come a long way, Adgardian."_

The sound of a deep voice freezes him in his tracks, his clear green eyes darting around the cave to seek out a source. A few more tentative steps and he's in a room that's beautifully carved out from the ice like a royal palace. They've done much redecorating since his and Thor's last visit he surmises as he halts before the King of Jotunheim. He sits atop a frozen throne, regal and mighty. He's much bigger than Loki remembers, his eyes a much deeper red and his skin a darker blue. His head and spine are adorned with icicle-like spikes. He regards the exiled Prince with an expressionless stare. 

"Your Highness, I come to you with much humility to ask of y-"

"No Asgardian boasts of humility. What is your true purpose here?" The King demands crassly. Loki feels his heart sink just that much deeper into his stomach. He stands up straight from his slight bow and clears his throat nervously. 

"The Allfather... has revealed to me my true... p- parentage. It would seem that I am... a Frost Giant." 

He doesn't know how else to come out with it, so he just says it. It's cruel and quite rude to bring up such a sensitive issue out of the blue like that, but... he's running out of options here. Just as the words leave his lips, at least a dozen other frost giants appear out of nowhere, the ice breaking from around them as if they'd been sleeping in glass coffins around the King. They immediately begin growling and snarling at him, prowling closer around him, sizing him up. 

But the King merely narrows his eyes with interest. 

"Prove it." He orders, a single flick of the wrist causing the other giants to back down slightly. 

Loki swallows down the imaginary lump in his throat but obeys the King anyway. He drops his Asgardian visage to reveal his true self. Now that he'd transformed in front of a bunch of other Jötuns, he can see just how similar but unique he is to the rest of them as well. His skin is blue, just like them but it's much paler. And the markings on the surface are much lighter but just as intricate. His ruby eyes gaze up at them, questioning, seeking approval... acceptance... 

"You think you can fool us, Trickster?" One of the giants snarls, unsheathing his claws and advancing on him. He quickly backs away but Laufey growls at the giant to step down. 

"Eleifir, that's enough." 

"The Asgardians have insulted us for the last time, Leifet!" 

Leifet rises to his feet, standing in all of his glory, his royal loincloth streaming down his legs in a golden strip. He walks really down the steps of his pedestal, coming to a stop when he reaches face to face with the little Prince. Loki's large green eyes blink up at the Jötun King, fearful but also in awe. 

"You came seeking asylum. But you won't find it here. It would seem you've come all this way for nothing." 

Loki shakes his head. "Pl- ...your majesty, please." 

"Who are you, if not a Prince of Asgard?" Leifet demands, his icy hand coming up to grip Loki by the chin, drawing his face up to his, their frosty breaths mingling together, Loki almost on his tiptoes. 

"I am Laufey's son... u- uh... the one lost to the Allfather in the first- ...war..." He gasps out, struggling to breathe as Leifet's other hand wraps around his throat. Up _this_ close and personal, he can see the abject differences between them; how much bigger Leifet is than his insignificant hide. His eyes plead for his mouth that's too busy gasping for breath but the King doesn't stop until he's almost passed out from the constriction. He's dropped unceremoniously to the floor just as his vision starts to blacken, his blue skin almost camouflaged on the blue, frozen floor. 

"His son?" One of the other giants parrots, his red eyes manic. But Leifet doesn't look fazed...

Not in the least. 

Instead, he stands tall above the young Jötun, proud and powerful, regarding him with disgust. 

"Father always spoke of his young little Jötun runt, too small to be a proper heir and too weak to live out the war." 

Loki feels tears spring to his eyes, but he's more confused than heartbroken or stricken for that matter. His brows furrow in question, a pathetic sight as he still sits on the floor, his limbs feeling like rubber as he realizes the implication of what Leifet had just said.

"Father? Then that means..." 

"And here I thought you were supposed to be the clever one. Yes, you runt. I _am_ your brother." Leifet chuckles cruelly, his grin revealing razor sharp teeth. 

The young Jötun isn't sure how to react to the news, taking a deep breath to regain his composure. He really _was_ Laufey's son, he thinks, his lips shaking but remaining frozen on his words that just won't come out. 

"You're my brother... my _real_ brother..." He stammers, tears in his eyes at the realization that Thor was right. They weren't brothers- not in this life or the next- they- _...they could never be._ Because the Frost Giant standing before him right now, was his real brother... his _blood_ brother. 

Leifet and Loki...

"And so is he," Leifet rubs in, pointing at Eleifir casually but quite acutely aware of just how groundbreaking this moment was for the poor runt. 

"And I." Another Giant proclaims mockingly, standing beside Eleifir, tall and proud. 

Leifet nods. "Yes. He is called Selekenir. Three sons of the great king Laufey. Until he had you and, what a precious little disappointment you turned out to be." 

It was stupid but Loki held some kind of hope that his brothers would cease their act and just welcome him home but as they all gang together, threatening him with their poisonous stares, he could feel reality dawn upon him. They hated him- and, _of course_ they did. 

Why wouldn't they? 

It was Laufey himself who had cast him out onto that frozen rock. 

"Father was ashamed that he would ever sire something as pathetic and abnormal as you. He faced that shame for the entire duration of his rule as king." Leifet informs him as if he'd read his mind. 

"So you could imagine his joy when Odin took you from that frozen rock. He'd hoped you would be dead within the week but then Odin announced the _birth_ of another son." Selekenir continues, his tone just as biting as the bitter words he spoke. 

"Asgard celebrates the birth of Loki Odinson! Oh it was the biggest mockery they've ever made of Jotunheim." Eleifir hisses in his face, his cool breath crackling on Loki's face like tiny icicles. He struggles to his feet, maintaining his Aesir form once more. 

"Well if it makes you any happier, Odin isn't too keen on keeping me around either." He coughs, wiping at his face trying to inconspicuously get rid of his tears. 

Leifet offers him a merciless smile. 

"Last I heard, the old fool has fallen into the Odinsleep. And with his oaf of a son Thor leading the way now, Asgard has only a matter of time before it falls." 

"Thor is no fool-!" Loki can't help but defend but the minute the words leave his lips, he freezes. 

Eleifir snarls at him, swiping a huge claw at his face. He only manages to evade the sudden attack by inches, a long, bloody scar marring his cheek. His pale hand comes up to touch the wound, fingertips coming away bloody. His huge green eyes gaze tearfully at his brothers, more out of hurt than actual shock. 

They were supposed to be his family...? 

"Is the little runt going to cry?" Selekenir taunts, a swift backhand connecting with Loki's other cheek, slicing the skin deep. He gasps, falling to the ground hard, dark blood dripping from the corner of his pale lips. Try as he might, he can't stop the stupid tears from slipping down his face, the salty water mixing with the blood there. He receives a series of swift kicks to the ribs from both Eleifir and Selekenir before Leifet raises a hand, his ruby eyes just past bored. 

They cease their attacks when he gives the signal, Loki gasping for breath on the floor, battered and bloody. 

"Enough, brothers. You've had your fun."

"What should we do with him? Feed him to the Helfheim beasts?" 

A look of panic crosses Loki's face but Leifet shakes his head. 

"No. Odin keeps provoking us but we will not rise to the bait. Go, little reject. And find your place elsewhere, for it is not with us." He commands, his deep voice crashing over Loki like a spiteful wave, battering over him harsher than any sword could. 

He's gone before another threat falls. 

 

..................

 

"Where is he?"

"Loki left during nightfall, my Lord." Heimdall answers, his tone clipped but prompt all the same. His golden eyes gaze upon the new King, the Bifrost sword in hand as Thor paces his new throne room worriedly. His hair is tied in a messy bun and his cape is askew, physical representations of his unsettled mind. 

The Frost Giants had just sent another merc to infiltrate Asgard's secret hall of artefacts won by Odin in his previous battles. The Tesseract had been the latest item on their agenda, right behind the Casket of Ancient Winters. The latter of course had been taken by Odin from Jotunheim itself so it only made sense that Leifet, their King, would want it back. 

The Tesseract however, was a new one. 

And it had the new King on edge. 

"This was his doing. It only makes sense that right after he leaves, Asgard receives a threat anew from those... those _miscreants!"_

Heimdall feels something akin to rage rise up from deep within him and it takes everything in him not to snap at the foolish King. He loved Thor like a son but _Gods was he daft at times._

He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, fist closing tightly around the Bifrost sword. 

"Forgive me but, Leifet and his lot have been infiltrating our borders for months now. This isn't a new threat and I sincerely doubt your brother has anything to do with this." 

"That _thing_ is not my brother." Thor growls, his tone fierce but his eyes troubled. 

"It is not Loki's fault that he was lied to by Odin for so many years. The Frost Giants may be a proper nuisance but Loki has never once hurt a soul intentionally." Heimdall responds evenly, his tone now defiant and solid as if he were talking to his own child. Thor grits his teeth impatiently, shaking his head and looking away as if to hide from the gatekeeper's brutal honesty. 

"Allow me some respect Heimdall. You have remained at my father's side for eons, at least pay me some kind of dignity." Thor demands crassly earning a heavy sigh from the gatekeeper. 

"Let it be known that I am the keeper of the Bifrost and loyal to Odin, the Allfather." 

"You dare defy your new King?" Thor snarls in disbelief, summoning Mjolnir to his hand. 

Heimdall's golden eyes glint dangerously at the blonde but he remains steady in his stance.

"I merely protest your arrogance, your Highness." 

Thor rolls his eyes, swinging his hammer angrily at the empty air. He's young, but he's been around long enough to know that Heimdall was one of the most prominent beings in the Nine Realms and a long time part of the family. He wouldn't fight his friend on his first night as King- or ever... but, he couldn't grasp why Heimdall seemed so passive aggressive about the whole Frost Giants invading Asgard issue. 

_And the fact that Loki was one of them._

"Where is he now?" 

Heimdall frowns at first but then he shakes his head. 

"I know nothing of his whereabouts. But he is lost. And alone." 

Thor grumbles to himself again, shaking his head as he paces back and forth in front of the throne he has yet to sit upon. 

"Do you mean to draw sympathy from me? He is a Frost Giant, Heimdall. He's probably been secretly letting Leifet and his beasts into Asgard one at a time without us knowing it." 

"He was unaware of his Jötun heritage before Odin told him." Heimdall reasons, forcing himself to keep a straight face as Thor becomes stumped and frustrated from his own ignorance. 

"You simply hate the Frost Giants because it's what you've been taught to do since birth. It would suffice to acknowledge that your father was a great King but it would benefit you immensely to also remember that he was also a warmonger."

"What is that supposed to mean?" 

"That is Odin's story to tell." Heimdall replies, his tone final. 

Thor frowns, his brows creasing his forehead, making him look more like Odin than himself. He processes Heimdall's words and their implications, his thoughts wrinkling his face and making him seem years beyond his true age. For him, no Jötun could be trusted, regardless of how they'd been brought up. 

Even Loki. 

Some deep, instinctive part of him begs to differ; calls out to that part of him that had nothing but love for his little brother. It forces him to remember all the times they'd spent together- inseparable, Frigga had called them. Thor was always off doing some crazy thing with his friends and not far behind would be Loki, happily following his big brother wherever he went. As they got older, things had only changed slightly, with Thor begging Loki to come on some grand and stupid adventure while Loki was nose deep in hundreds of Ancient, leather bound books about magic and illusions. 

When the nights got cold and scary though, they were always together, Loki clinging to Thor tightly, his smaller body shivering. 

A shiver slithers down his spine at the thought, and his body shakes slightly with an instinctive need to feel Loki against him, his head in his chest, his slight body curling on him like a soft and warm kitten. He could almost feel Loki's silky black hair running past his fingers, cool and soft...

...but then he closes his eyes and- ...and all he can see is Loki, with blood red eyes and skin blue like the ocean, marred with Jötun rune-like markings on the surface. He can feel the coldness emanating from Loki's skin and... And he _hates it._ He awakens from the dream vexed and frustrated. He swings Mjolnir with a snarl, blue eyes sharp and disturbed. 

"I will return in a few days." Is his only promise as his hammer leads him up and away, Heimdall summoning the Bifrost without hesitation. Wherever the King is going, the gatekeeper hopes he finds the answers he's looking for... along with his brother. 

He gazes upon Odin resting peacefully in the Odinsleep, wishing the old man was awake to see his Kingdom fall apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy minhoy


	3. The Hills Have Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki keeps wandering until he ends up in some weird place... Thor has questions...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for my lateness in updating but I've been sick af :(

The Hills Have Eyes 

 

"Catch me if you can!" 

Thor's hair is as golden as the sunrise as he runs off into the distance, his profile becoming smaller and smaller as he speeds up. Loki is behind him, out of breath and red in the face but still attempting to catch up with his brother. His hair is short and drenched in sweat but his grin matches the huge one on Thor's face as he slows down for his little brother. It was the first time in months that Loki had allowed himself to go outside and play with the other kids. He'd been holed up all day and all night in the library sitting amidst thick, dusty books and papers all about magic and the different interpretations of magic. And Thor was beginning to get annoyed by his self-induced isolation so he begged him to come out and play. 

At least, that's how it started...

Now, all Thor seemed to be doing was running away from him. 

"Thor! Come back!" He pants, dropping to his knees in the soft grass. He wipes at his sweaty forehead before lying back in the grass, green eyes staring up at the sky. It was vibrant and blue, a reflection of his brother's good mood, he guessed, ear twitching as footsteps near him. He turns to see Thor stomping up to him with an angry expression. 

"You stopped chasing me." He protests childishly, stomping his right foot. The clouds above begin to rumble and knit closer together like thick, grey blankets. 

"I couldn't keep up." Loki admits, knowing deep down that vanity was always the way to Thor's heart. He offers his brother a cute smile that widens when Thor plops down on the ground next to him. He feels Thor's had run through his greasy hair and quickly pulls away. 

"Stop that..." He grumbles, attempting to fix his wild hair in vain. Thor only pokes him in response, tucking a wavy strand behind his ear before planting a sweet kiss on his temple. Loki can feel his electric blue eyes studying him avidly. 

It ticks on his nerves.

 _"What?"_ He grumbles, blushing as Thor's strong arms come to wrap around his waist. They're suddenly kids no longer and Loki finds himself leaning back against Thor's strong chest, his own body fitted in between Thor's legs like pieces of a perfect puzzle. Thor's eyes are still watching him quietly. 

"Nothing. Well- ...it's just that... you're so _pretty_ brother." He finally says, grinning stupidly like a little girl after talking to her first crush. Loki can feel the crazy red blush coming to his cheeks so he hides his face in Thor's neck, purring softly when his brother's hand comes up to stroke his neck like he always does. The touch feels different though- ...much more intimate than it has any right to be. Thor's thumb strokes at his jaw, rubbing past his lower lip, pulling at it slightly. He hears a low rumble erupt in Thor's chest and it causes him to look up. 

He freezes. 

Green eyes meet blue in a never ending staring contest, their breathing slowed considerably to at least one breath per minute. Their lips are so close that Loki can almost taste Thor on his tongue and the feeling is akin to that of being drunk and high at the same time. Thor's grip on his jaw and the one he has in Loki's hair becomes tighter, more possessive and Loki finds some buried part of him responding to that alpha nature. He keens softly, legs moving to wrap around Thor's waist as he situates himself right in Thor's lap. 

"Loki..." Thor rasps, hands in those long, silk-black tresses, making Loki purr like a kitten. 

"Yes... brother..." Loki moans out quietly, his head leaned back as he revels in the sensual feeling of Thor's hands touching him, stroking him. 

_"My sweet, little Loki."_

_"Yes brother..."_

Their lips finally meet and it fe- 

"Oh my, what do we have here?"

The dream suddenly dissolves like paper in water, leaving Loki frustrated, hot and disoriented. His brow furrows as his eyes flutter open, lashes thick and heavy on his cheekbones. Bright colours and sparkling lights swim past his eyes as he struggles to focus on the figure standing tall before him. His head hurts, a vague and distant reminder that he'd been hit over the head. He feels disconnected despite his entire body resting there on the chair. Flashes of memories go off in his mind's eye, of leaving Jotunheim, finding a swirling vortex and him falling into said vortex. 

"My my Scrapper 142, you always bring me the best specimens in all of the Galaxy, truly. Tell me, who is this?" The man draped in bright blue and glittery golds gushes cheerily. His eyes scan Loki up and down as if he were some kind of delicacy, making the ex-prince uncomfortable. 

Then he hears a woman's voice.

"This one comes all the way from Asgard."

"Ass-gard? Sounds _divine."_ The man replies, his tone sexually charged and suggestive. 

"Though he is muscular, his build isn't fit for battle with your champion. He's lithe and bendable though, so, y'know, he might be of good use for something else." 

The man grins like a Cheshire Cat. 

"So he isn't a contender but that's fine. I can think of a million different ways to put him to good use. Topaz? Pay this lady." 

"I'm taking four billion units." The woman answers boldly to another who scoffs obnoxiously.

"You'll get one billion, _Trash."_

The man steps in. "Come come now Topaz, we know that's not her name. She's a Scrapper so you can either call her that or 142. Play nice." 

The transfer of payment for him is made after a few clicks and beeps and before Loki knows it, he's alone with the man, sitting opposite him, strapped to a chair. His head hurts but not more than his chest which just seems to feel heavy and hollow at the same time. His hair is a greasy, disheveled mess and his clothes have been worn out to mere threadbare patches hanging off his body. 

He's never felt more alone. 

"What's your uh name sweetheart?" The man asks, standing up from his throne and approaching with an air of propriety. 

Loki blinks at him stupidly for a few seconds before answering quietly. "Loki Od- ... just Loki." 

The man runs a finger through his silver hair, looking a bit befuddled as he practices the difficult name on his tongue. 

"Wow, that is a mouthful. _LokiodjustLoki."_

"No, it's just Loki. L-o-k-i." Loki corrects, cheeks burning in shame at his lack of eloquence. It would seem as if he'd lost more than just his royal title after his exile. The man _aha's_ in understanding.

"Ah, okay. Hmm, Loki, huh? Such a pretty name for _such_ a pretty face."

Loki blushes. 

"Well, sweetcheeks, I am the Grandmaster: En Dwi Gast of this great planet of Sakaar. I'm sure you've heard of it on Ass-world."

"Asgard." Loki corrects quietly before shaking his head. "No I've never heard about this place. Why am I in restraints?" He questions, trying to lift his wrists from the magnetic silver bands that hold them in place. 

"Because darling, many of those who come to this place are either trying to escape or they wind up here by accident. And as Grandmaster, I need to keep track of all the newcomers that enter my planet. Does that make sense?" Grandmaster asks him gently, stroking the side of his face. He pulls away slightly, not used to anyone's touch but Thor's. 

He'd be lying if he said it didn't feel good though. 

"I suppose." 

Grandmaster studies him for a while, pacing back and forth slowly in his golden gown, hands behind his back. His dark hazel eyes are thickly circled by dark liner, the bottom lashline done up with sparkly blue glitter. His face sports the same coloured markings going down in a straight line from his lips. Loki can tell he is a deity of some kind but, he's never heard of anyone called En Dwi Gast. 

"Come." Grandmaster calls sweetly, the silver bands releasing his hands immediately, allowing him the freedom to move. He gets up, shakily to his feet before slowly following the Grandmaster. 

After retreating from Jotunheim with his tail between his legs, bloody cheek smarting like a kicked puppy, he'd just let himself wander. Leaving Jotunheim was easy, but it was deciding upon a destination that proved highly difficult. He thought of Xandar or Midgard, or maybe even Titan- the Gods knew he was desperate for some kind of shelter. But much to his dismay, he could think of no planet in which he'd be welcomed with open arms and smiling mouths. Whether he accepted it or not, Thor was always the popular one who everyone loved and simply adored. He was the insignificant little brother. 

Still was- _is._

It was being ensnared in the wires of his thoughts that he'd come upon a huge vortex in space- so eloquently called the Devil's Anus, unbeknownst to the exiled child- and was sucked into it, left at the mercy of its powerful charge. He'd decided then and there that wherever he ended up- if he was still alive by then, that he'd simply accept his fate. Thor had chased him away and so did his real brothers. 

There was nothing left for him to live for... to fight for. 

Why should he try?

 

....................

 

"Thor! Great timing, we seem to be in quite a pickle." 

The guilty grin on Tony Stark's face tells the Asgardian King all he needs to know about the current situation on Midgard. He rolls his eyes and swings Mjolnir, smashing it through three of Tony's robots. 

"Something tells me you had a hand in this, Man of Iron!" He yells, fighting off a bot that had latched on to him. On the other side of the room, Cap is frisbeeing his shield through a bot that had almost decapitated Clint. 

"You would be correct!" Steve grunts, helping Clint up who then grabs the returning shield before sending it flying towards the robot currently attacking Nat and Bruce. 

"Seconded!" 

Tony snorts sheepishly, jumping on one of the bots suspended in the air. 

"Oh please Legolas! This is hardly my fault alone." He gasps, sticking a screwdriver straight through the bot's neck, disposing of it as quickly as it came to life. 

"Who _else_ is there to blame for this army of robots on a death mission Stark?" Natasha growls, backflipping to dodge a barrage of bullets. 

Tony grins at her stupidly, shrugging innocently. "Uh, Bruce?" 

Banner turns to gape at Tony whilst trying to keep calm from all the commotion. 

"Me?! Oh no Tones, this isn't Ultron again!" 

"Oh this is totally Ultron all over again!" Rhodey grouses, flying into the room to shoot down the robots. War Machine deals with the last remaining robots, powering them down with a swift slice through their mechanic necks, wires sparking brightly as the shaft cuts through them. 

Avengers Tower is silent after that, save for their heavy breathing and the sound of clinking bullet casings. The entire den is a mess of shattered glass, smashed beer bottles and metal pieces. The heroes all turn their guilty stares to Tony who looks behind him as if they were looking at someone else. He turns back around with a nervous grin and an adorable shrug to go along with it. 

"Guys, it was a simple crossing of the wrong wires. I was up all night-" 

"And that's exactly how you got the wires crossed, Stark." 

They all turn to see Dr Strange stepping into the room through his portal, his face grave with disapproval. Tony's nose wrinkles at the sight of the sorcerer supreme and he folds his arms petulantly. 

"I had it all under control, thank you very much." He pouts irritatedly, collapsing into the soft sofa at the broken coffee table. His eyes flutter briefly, head in his hands like a man burdened with the weight of the world. Thor can relate to that feeling, so he doesn't dare judge, doesn't say a word. The rest of the Avengers join him on the sofa, keeping their distance to give him space but sitting close enough to be there for him. 

"Tony, why build the army of homicidal robots?" Natasha asks him quietly, her eyes regarding him carefully. 

Tony shakes his head, wincing as if he'd been burned. His Braun was firing off a thousand thought processes at a time and he couldn't shut it off. He thought about telling them the truth- that he was plagued with the worry of an extra-terrestrial threat and that it kept him up at night for days on end... 

But, no. 

He wouldn't- ... _couldn't._

He'd go to his grave first before ever telling anyone what he'd been feeling. 

"It was just an experiment guys." He answers softly, avoiding their concerned eyes. "Just an experiment." 

Thankfully Bruce nods in understanding, knowing when it was time to stop pushing. 

"It's okay Tony, you've been trying so hard to make this new program work. Not taking breaks in between can get to you, y'know." 

He offers Bruce a weak but fucking grateful smile, passing a hand over his sweaty face. 

"Y- yeah, a break was all I needed." 

Stephen's brow raises mockingly. "Wow, Tony Stark actually admitting when he's wrong. Thought I'd never see the day." 

Tony goes to make some kind of snark reply but halts almost immediately when Stephen conjures up a cup of green tea for him. He glares at the man but accepts the hot drink with shaky hands. 

"Well Jesus Tony, can you just take a nap then instead of creating things that want to kill us?" Steve jokes and thankfully that seems to break the tension in the room, Thor and Clint chuckling quietly at Cap's humor. 

"I agree." Thor cheers as Clint cracks open a bottle of cold beer. 

"Yeah man, it'd be nice if you could create a warm, cuddly bear that attacked you in your sleep by hugging your cold feet and making it warm and toasty." 

Natasha rolls her eyes, sipping her own beer. "Don't mind Barton, I'll just buy you a stuffed teddy." 

"Thanks Tasha." Clint grins brightly, as Rhodey extracts himself out of his War Machine suit. 

"And thanks Rhodey, for saving our collective asses." Tony grins as his best friend shakes his head at him. He's used to the judgemental look from the colonel who looks at him like that _all_ the time. 

"Thanks Rhodey." They all chorus, raising their bottles. 

"No problem guys." Rhodey plays along, grabbing his own beer. 

"Um, I helped too. Just about smashed fifty of those things with my hammer alone." Thor scoffs jokingly, sipping his own blend of Asgardian mead. 

"Sure Thor, I'll give you that." 

"There weren't even that many bots!" 

"So, Thor. What brings you out here so suddenly? Came to visit?" Steve asks. 

Thor nods but then shakes his head. 

Clint frowns. "Everything alright in Asgard?" 

"I don't think so. My father has fallen into the Odinsleep and- ..." 

They all remain quiet, anxiously waiting for him to continue. 

"And he- ...I am now King." He reveals trying to sound happy about it but the look in his eyes tells them that he's heavily burdened with grief and worry.

"Wow dude, congratulations." Tony grins, patting him on the back. 

"Yeah, that's some pretty major stuff." Rhodey agrees. 

Thor nods, but then frowns hard. "Friends, I wish it were that simple though."

"How so?" Steve asks him, chugging another beer. His question comes from a place of understanding. An understanding that it was hard for a good man to become King when people had expectations of him and wanted him to be perfect even in his imperfections. 

"My brother... well, he isn't my brother anymore." 

They all frown at him. 

"You mean, Loki?" Stephen questions cautiously, sounding as if he already knew what the problem was. 

Thor's eyes twitch at the name but he nods anyway. "Yes. Turns out he isn't actually my brother."

Tasha frowns. "How?" 

"Odin revealed to us that he's actually of Jotunheim..." 

"A Frost Giant?" Strange demands, his gray-blue eyes shining but his expression inconspicuous. Thor's gaze snaps up to the sorcerer supreme, nodding his head slowly. 

"Yes."

Clint looks between them, eyes darting from one to the next comically. "Okay, is that supposed to be a bad thing? Or a good thing?" 

"The former, I'm afraid." Thor answers sadly, tucking a blonde strand behind his ear. 

"Why is it a bad thing?" Steve chirps, his brow raising in question. 

"Yeah, what's a Frost Giant?" Tasha chimes in. 

Thor scoffs at their ignorance. "The Frost Giants of Jotunheim are the most vile and wretched creatures ever created. They've made it their life's purpose to see the fall of Asgard."

"B- ...but now your brother is one of them?" 

Thor nods at Rhodey. "He was never my brother. Father rescued him from a frozen rock where he'd been cast out as a baby. Took him in as a courtesy and now the Frost Giants are acting up again and I fear Loki has something to do with it." 

Tony frowns. "Did Loki know? About his true heritage?" 

Thor shakes his head. "No, father revealed it to us when I became King." 

"So he didn't know about it?" 

Thor mutters a soft, "No." 

"He grew up his entire life believing he was Asgardian. Pfft, man that's a tough one." Clint scoffs, shaking his head. 

"How so, Agent Barton?" Thor questions curiously as if missing the point entirely. Clint shoots him an incredulous look, chugging his beer. 

"Dude, he thought he was Asgardian royalty. Now he knows why he can't be King."

"Yeah and why he wasn't in line for the throne in the first place." Steve adds. 

Thor shakes his head. "But that doesn't mean he won't turn on me. Loki hates Odin and I'm sure he will stop at nothing to get back at him." 

"Well, I'm sure he's full of resentment. And rightfully so." Tasha states with a nod. 

Steve frowns hard. "I don't understand where all this... this is coming from Thor. I thought you loved your brother. I mean, everytime you've come to Earth, Loki was all you'd ever talk about. I just can't see how all of that can change in an instant." 

Thor sighed heavily, fingers idly touching Mjolnir, running across its smooth surface. 

_'If only they knew how the Frost Giants were, they'd understand.'_

"Then think of the Jötuns as Nazis, Captain. Warmongers made to seek out nothing but conflict, the death of the Asgardian race and destruction. That is the line from which Loki hath descended. As King, I'll not have it in Asgard." 

Steve remains silent after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy


	4. Your Body And Your Soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor does some more thinking; Loki doesn't know what to think about the Grandmaster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so reading the comments have been illuminating as to the audience that's reading this fic and if just like to say that this is my adaptation of Thor and Loki. If y'all watch the Thor from Thor 1, he was arrogant and hardheaded. And Loki was the total opposite. I know y'all think I'm going to just make Thor apologize and Loki would just take him back but I haven't written anything like that. So, just enjoy and if you don't like where the story's going, feel free to click out. Thx

Your Body And Your Soul 

 

Tired green eyes study the room around him, blankly and with passing interest. 

The walls are like smooth streams of gold towering high above them with never-ending length, as if they're reaching into the clouds. The porcelain amenities in the spacious room glitter with silver and ruby accents all reflective and pretty. He notes the large bathtub in the middle of the posh room, made of sparkly black marble and gold accents. It's filled halfway with steaming, milky liquid and pink and dark red rose petals. The scent that rises from the steam is thick, warm, heady and sweet. Like soft vanilla and sugary spice. His lids immediately begin drooping at the pleasant smell. 

"Take those ugly strings of clothes off of my princess." Grandmaster orders his pink and purple alien servants, his prey-like eyes gauging the sleepy boy standing like he's lost in the middle of the room. Because that's what he was, essentially, to the Grandmaster. Not a Prince of Ass-place, or an exile or whatever. For En, Loki was a little lost soul who just needed love and attention and he was appropriately equipped to take care of his princess. 

After all, he owned Loki now. And he took care of his things. 

The servants, Sigma and Galoris respectively, quickly but carefully stripped Loki of his threadbare shirt and trousers, gasping in unison at the bruises revealed on that pale, porcelain skin. Loki had been much too weak to heal his bruises properly after he'd fled from Jotunheim and so he'd left the angry red, blue-black and purple splotches on his ribs and back. The bruising on his cheek was faint. Grandmaster frowned at the sight, more curious than angry but still heartbroken for his little princess. 

But then his eyes travel lower down Loki's slim body and instantly his attentions are refocused. After he takes in the wonderful sight of that beautiful jaw, neckline down to his pale chest and soft, pink nipples, the flat, pale stomach leads all the way down to a smooth, hairless front where there is no male genitalia but rather the opposite. The Grandmaster could feel his own body tightening deliciously at this revelation, realizing his princess was in fact a Jötun. The intersex feature was particularly original to the Frost Giant race. 

"My my, how lucky am I? Right girls?" He leers excitedly to his servants who offer him matching grins. Loki merely stands there, swaying on his bare feet, eyes halfway closed as they let down his hair. Long, silky black curls sway gently past sharp, seductive shoulders, tickling his collarbones. He swallows, stuttering slightly as they lead him to the tub, holding him before it like some kind of sacrifice. 

"Okay now girls, leave us." Grandmaster orders, his lips drawn in a straight, concentrated line. His eyes are trained on Loki like a sniper, unmoving yet aware of every twitch of his body and every tiny gasp that leaves the precious thing's lips. He slides his hands to Loki's hips, dark tan skin glowing on the pale expanse. His fingertips trace the smooth flanks, travelling up to his bruises ribs, fingers just barely tweaking his nipples. A soft whimper sounds from Loki's mouth as Grandmaster breathes down his slim neck, pressing soft little kisses up and down. 

"I'm gonna clean you up darling. Don't worry, I've got you, my little lotus blossom." He coos gently in Loki's ear before disrobing. Loki barely reacts as Grandmaster gets in the steaming bath, pulling the pale prince down to sit between his legs. He practically melts against the man's strong chest, neck on display as his head rests back on Grandmaster's shoulder. His long, graceful legs stretch the length of the tub, partly concealed beneath the milky water, his knees just barely showing, glistening from the wetness. His long, tapering fingers play idly with a cluster of rose petals floating in the water as the Grandmaster starts washing his hair. 

"Y'know, I've never seen such a pretty thing like you before. Wherever this Ass-world is, there must be a lot of other gorgeous things like you. Of course I could ask you why you're not from Jotunheim since you are Jötun... but, it's okay princess, I'm not interested in that. I only want you, body and soul... ah yes, you belong to me now." He rasps, hands massaging Loki's scalp, playing with his hair like he was some kind of doll. Loki merely sighs, eyes finally closing as Grandmaster keeps playing with his hair. The vanilla scent wafts up and across his face, pulling him under its spell. It was a disorienting agent that En usually used for his much less pliant guests but seeing as Loki was so beaten down and tired and weak, it made him the perfect victim. 

Not that the Grandmaster saw it that way. 

For him, he'd taken Loki off the wandering streets and into a loving and caring space. Whoever let his gorgeous princess go, was the unluckiest person in the entire galaxy. He slides his hands from Loki's long, wet hair to his chest, going lower past his belly to his thighs. He swallows anxiously, eyes focused on the way those long, pale legs spread open, pliant and welcoming. The space between his legs is concealed by the milky rose water but he isn't fazed by this. He dips a hand down between that forbidden valley and strokes his middle finger up. Loki gasps out long and slow, back arching against Grandmaster's front, his mouth wide open but no words leaving him. 

"Mmm, you feel like silk _right there_ sweetheart." He whispers in Loki's ear, all slurred and seductive while Loki writhes under his touch. The arousal awakens something in Loki and he gasps, sitting up straight as if someone had reset his batteries. 

"Wh- ...what are you doing?" He demands weakly, pushing away the Grandmaster's hands and pulling his legs together. En frowns at him, struggling to keep him from scampering out of the bath. 

"Wait- honey, hold on- slow down love. You're safe." He reassures, gauging the way Loki freezes at the kind terms of endearment. It was as if he hadn't been spoken to so softly or treated like he mattered in a long time. Brilliant green eyes gaze back at him, tearful and melancholic. 

"Where am I?" He asks softly, that tender pleading in his tone turning the Grandmaster on more than he'd wanted to be turned on at that moment. He reaches out a hand, frowning as the pretty thing flinches before leaning into his touch. He pets him, strokes his hair and plants a kiss to his forehead. 

"You're on Sakaar love, I thought I told you that." He replies sweetly, as if he's talking to a child. 

En feels his stomach become giddy with excitement as Loki's innocence and purity shines through his naive mannerisms. He gently pulls the Prince back against his chest, two fingers pressing his forehead to guide his head back on the Grandmaster's shoulder. 

"I've taken it upon myself to clean you up and get rid of those nasty cuts and bruises." He tells his captive, stroking the underside of his ribs where he'd been injured. Loki twitches a little in his hands but otherwise doesn't make to move away again. He instead quietly studies his naked, glistening body, eyes silently following the Grandmaster's touch. The bruises on his cheeks and ribs are gone, as if they'd never existed. 

"Th- ...thank you." Loki murmurs softly, becoming distant again. Grandmaster doesn't mind however, and decides to simply wash them both and then get out of the tub. 

 

..................

 

"You okay?" 

Thor takes a minute out of his brooding to turn and acknowledge Clint with a small nod. He turns back to his staring contest with Tony's mask, ignoring the loud curses coming out from the mechanic's mouth as he drops a wrench on his toes. Stephen appears out of nowhere and looks at him sternly until he sits on the table and allows the magician to assess his damages. 

"I am fine, Agent Barton. No need to spy on me as if I'm some kind of kicked mammal." He says finally, smirking at the man who takes up residence on the beam above him. 

"Puppy." Clint corrects with a casual air. 

"What?" Thor remarks, confused. 

Clint shakes his head. "Like a kicked puppy." 

The God of Thunder scoffs, grinning at the archer. 

"I must apologise for my slowness in catching on to Earth's customs. Your lexicon and jargon are very difficult to negotiate." 

Clint shrugs. "It's cool. You gotta stop with the constipated look though. It's freaking Bruce out." 

Thor smiles fondly at the thought of Bruce panicking in some corner about his well-being. 

"Again, my apologies. I truly wish I could dissolve the chaos that rages inside of my head." 

"Worried about Loki?" 

The God winces at the familiar name, as if it were sharpened at the edges with a knife. His thick brows crease together, blue eyes filled with abject fear and worry, confusion and uncertainty. 

"Perhaps not as worried for him as I am worried about him. He could be plotting my demise right at this moment." 

"Or lost somewhere in space with nowhere to go and no one to talk to." Clint suggests easily, keeping his voice toneless. Reverse psychology was a fragile piece of glass that could be broken at the slightest sentiment. 

"I'm sure he's already made it to Jotunheim. He's very convincing as well, so mobilizing Leifet and his army shouldn't be too hard." Thor insists, intertwining his fingers idly. 

"What was his reaction?" Clint questions quietly, playing with one of his arrows.

"His reaction to what?"

"When Odin told him what he really was?" 

Thor feels his focus blur, his eyes on Stephen and Tony but his mind a million light years away. His memories flicker like a video reel, going back to that faithful day when he was to become King. 

_The sun had been out in all its glory that day, it seemed, smiling upon him and his people as if it were happy. Without Frigga, the whole ceremony had lost its grandeur so Odin had it made into a small and intimate event. Just the people, his sons and himself. No great feast, no great parade on the Bifrost, no grand gesture to the ancestors._

_Thor remembers himself and Loki getting ready excitedly, like two kids on a sugar high, brilliant grins on their faces and hope for the future in their eyes. Loki had been nervous since the night before and so his poor hands shook as he attempted to slide on his undergarments._

_"Having trouble brother?" Thor had asked, smirking as the dark haired prince struggled with something on the other side of the wall. He could hear the crashing of various bottles and other paraphernalia falling to the floor as Loki tripped unceremoniously over his own feet._

_"Oh no, I'm just fine brother. That was just the sound of my patience, falling to the floor." Loki had snarked back frustratedly, the sound of shattering glass filling the wall between them. Thor had been in such a panic after hearing Loki squeak out in fright, that he'd come charging into his brother's dressing room, without any regards for his state of dress._

_"Lo-"_

_It was by some miracle that Loki hadn't heard him trampling in and he couldn't have been more grateful as he realized his baby brother was naked as the day he was born. He lay sprawled out on his side amongst the shattered glass fragments, bare skin glowing in the dim room. Thor had allowed his eyes to travel the pale expanse of his brother's back, taking in every soft ridge of bone and muscle, the pretty curve of his spine and the way his long black curls brushed against his skin. He could hear soft grumbling and pained whimpers coming from his brother as he tried to sit upright. It was some kind of joke that Thor didn't feel any type of weird way gazing at his brother's pert butt, all round and totally squeezable. But he shook his head anyway._

He's your brother! 

_"Here, let me help you." He heard himself say, ignoring the spooked gasp escaping Loki who immediately tries to conceal his modesty. It's a failed attempt as he realizes the meagre piece of underwear he'd tried to hide behind._

_"Thor! What are you doing in here?!" He hissed, crossing his long legs shyly, a deep red blush exploding on his cheeks. Thor ignored him however, noticing the long line of ruby red blood running down his knee._

_"You're hurt." He'd said simply, inviting himself into Loki's dressing room and locking the door behind him. He'd been aware of Loki's... condition because of Frigga who'd told him that Loki was special after he'd seen his little brother naked when they were kids. It was confusing as a child when he realized that Loki didn't have the same parts that he did. It would be centuries after that Thor would come to appreciate Loki's body in a much different way than a brother should._

_Frigga would have killed him if she were alive to notice._

_"Thor I'm fine." Loki muttered softly, as he felt his brother's strong, calloused hands on his bare legs. Thor tried his best to ignore the soft curve of a "V" leading down to that beautiful, smooth, hairless pelvis. He instead focused on the small cut Loki had gotten from a glass splinter that was still lodged halfway into his flesh._

_"No, you're not but it's okay brother. I'm here." He'd reassured him, petting him tenderly before moving to pull out the splinter. His hand was stopped however by Loki resting his own hand over it. He looked up into those pretty green eyes and noticed the fear and confusion, the pure want and need to just be there with each other in that moment._

_And he loved it._

_He'd gently plucked the sparkly sliver of glass from the tiny red incision on Loki's knee, thankful that his brother hadn't cried._

He did after Odin's revelation though...

"That doesn't sound like a bad guy, Thor." Clint says softly, breaking him out of his reverie. He frowns, blinking a couple times before waking up fully. 

Did he just tell Clint about him and Loki in the dressing room? 

"Wh- I don't understand..." He mutters, eyes searching Clint's face for judgement. 

He finds none.

"Your brother, when Odin told him that he was a Frost Giant." 

Thor nods. 

"Doesn't sound like he had a clue. He's just as innocent as you in all of this." 

The blonde God shakes his head stubbornly. "How can I know for sure?" 

Clint studies him in that inconspicuous way he does to everyone, gray-blue eyes still. After a while he just shrugs and offers the God a wry smile. 

"I'll tell you something no one else knows. I loved my father, practically worshipped the man. Loved him so much to the point where his abuse was just something I excused." 

Thor listened silently, as if acutely aware of the gravity of the situation. Clint was one of the most mysterious of the Avengers, keeping mostly to himself when he could. So to bear witness to one of his most vulnerable sides was pretty much a privilege. And Thor knew enough to respect that. 

The archer continues. 

"I told myself, he knows what's best. I could take the beatings, the punishments and the confinement. But then one day, I- ...I saw him hit my little brother; and that was it. I lost all faith I had in the bastard, waited til he was drunk and passed out and took my brotger and ran. We never looked back. Not even when he died two weeks later in some accident." 

The Asgardian King could feel something righteous rise within him as he listened to Clint's story, angered by the injustice his friend had faced. How _dare_ a father treat his offspring with such, indignity? 

"Clint-" 

It's the first time he's ever called the man by his first name. 

"I didn't tell you that to gain your sympathies." Clint says quickly, sharply. "I just wanted you to see how dangerous blind loyalty is. Father had been abusive towards my brother for a long time but I hadn't seen it because I was too busy making excuses for the man. And then I did see it, and I did something about it. Maybe Loki is bad or maybe he isn't. You're not solving anything by pushing him away though. Odin was wrong to keep that a secret. At least, that's the way I see it." 

Thor is quiet for some time but it isn't a revered sort of silence. 

No. 

It is a loud quiet that's filled with thoughts going through his mind like bullet trains too loud to properly form a theory or a solution. He glances down at his hammer and thinks of the day Odin gave it to him. That was weeks before the ceremony, just so that he'd get used to it. For his entire life, Odin had been the shining example he'd always aspired to become. The man was the greatest King in all of the Galaxy, and the Allfather. 

How could he be wrong? 

He recalls Heimdall's words to him just before he left;

 _"It would suffice to acknowledge that your father was a great King but it would benefit you immensely to also remember that he was also a warmonger."_

Thor found himself mimicking Clint in that moment, excusing Odin's behaviour to save himself from see in the man in a bad light. 

Could his father have been wrong about... about Loki? About everything? 

_Was he?_

He stands from his perch on Tony's workchair, just as Stephen plants a gentle kiss on the mechanic's forehead. Clint gazes down at him with silent eyes but a small grin. 

"My father has fallen into the Odinsleep. It is futile trying to seek answers from him now."

The archer shrugs nonchalantly. 

"Then go find Loki."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy


	5. Lost And Insecure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor visits his enemies, Loki's quickly losing hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been having a bad case of writer's block lately :/ I'm sad

Lost And Insecure 

 

"I think that gown looks _gorgeous_ on you sweetheart." 

Loki stood before the Grandmaster, draped in a sheer emerald gown made of the finest silk and gold threading. The material slipped and flowed on his skin like water, accentuating every curve and muscle beneath it. His pale skin glowed through the gown, all exposed for the Grandmaster to enjoy as he was allowed no undergarments. His hair flowed down his back like sleek, raven waves, curling daintily at the ends. Atop his head was a golden halo crown, encrusted with perfect green emeralds and pure white diamonds. He was dressed like Sakaarian royalty. 

"I sincerely appreciate the gesture- I- I really do but all this is not necessary." He rejects politely, frowning as one of the alien maidens applies shimmery blue paint to his lips and eyelids. He tries to pull his face away but her nails dig into him briefly before letting him go again. 

"Easy Esmeralda. Don't scratch my little princess." Grandmaster warns a bit lightly, a bit seriously. He refocuses his eyes on Loki, narrowing them curiously. 

"What would you prefer to wear, my darling?" 

Loki shakes his head, indecisive. "Perhaps my regular attire or-" 

"Oh dear, we threw those tattered pieces of string out. No mate of mine is living in this palace looking like _that."_ Grandmaster interrupts, approaching the beautiful God from his golden throne. Loki swallows nervously as they come face-to-face.

"Mate?" 

"Do you remember how we found you? Passed out and battered like a rejected dog? I've given you a place to stay. I'm guessing those you've met along the way weren't so kind." 

Loki has the dignity to look ashamed as he lowers his gaze and offers the Grandmaster a small smile. 

"They were not." 

The flamboyant being raises his brows pointedly at him before stroking a hand through his hair. He tries to be subtle about pulling away from the touch. 

"But, I don't recall having a destination in mind so perhaps if I could be graciously excused from your indulgences, I could be on my way in no time." 

The Grandmaster's smile disappears in an instant, his hazel eyes glinting hard at the ungrateful whelp. His grip in Loki's hair tightens, yanking the prince's head back roughly. 

"Listen to me, _child;_ you are in no position to make demands."

"I- I wasn't deman-" Loki struggles to defend himself but is cut off by the Grandmaster's hand cupping over his mouth, smearing the blue lipstick. 

"You may very well be the most seductive piece of candy I've ever seen but do not mistake my _indulgences_ for weakness. You're mine now and if Topaz had her way, she would be melting you right now with the melt stick. But I won't let her, because I'm one of the good guys." He threatens sweetly, a different smile adorning his face as Loki starts to struggle in his grip. 

"Let me go!" He growls finally drawing the strength to free himself. He stumbles back but quickly finds his balance, green eyes glowing fiercely with his Seidr. The Grandmaster hisses, conjuring his own magic that shines golden from his hands. 

"You're a sorcerer are you?" 

Loki glares. "I am a God." 

"Well, we'll see about that." 

The Grandmaster binds Loki with his magic within seconds, his Seidr failing him as the green glow from his hands disappears. He gasps in shock as his body spasms hard, as if the very life in him was being sucked out. His lips are gaping wide open but his words fail him. He can't speak, can't move, can't do anything except watch everything happen to him. It's like the Grandmaster reached inside of his gut and tore his Seidr out. He could see the green light shining before him before it vanishes in a flash. 

He drops unceremoniously to the floor, panting from the exertion, cold sweat drenching his body. 

"Wh- what did you do to me?!" He cries, struggling to get to his feet. The Grandmaster grins sadistically at him, yanking him up by the neck. 

"I, have just taken your _moxie_ away from you sugarplum. You're as Godly as a rock now, really." The man declares proudly, squeezing Loki's throat tighter and tighter until his precious green eyes beg out for mercy. 

"Pl- uh! Please!" He mouths but the sound is a bit warped and choked up. The Grandmaster takes mercy though, shaking him hard instead before slamming him hard into the ground. 

"You've just attempted to zap one of the most powerful beings in the universe. I'd have you publicly executed if you weren't so goddamn cute. But I can already dream up some punishments for you." 

"My Seidr..." Loki chokes, spluttering weakly, his face red. 

The Grandmaster pets him softly now, almost like his last few threats had never happened. 

"Shh, don't worry princess. It's in a safe place." 

All fight leaves the exiled Prince then, his body losing its tension as the Grandmaster continues to pet him and place tender kisses on his forehead like a mockery of kindness. His magic was the key part of him that felt like he still had a family. It was a part of Frigga that she'd shared with him ever since he was a child. And now it was gone. Just like that... just like his home, his father and his brother... 

...it was all, _gone._

What more could he lose? 

He lies there, tears slipping from vacant green eyes. 

He's given up. 

 

................

 

Thor doesn't know where to go at first, his head spinning with the sheer magnitude of the idea of searching the entire universe for Loki. 

He stands, still and solitary in one of the training fields at Avengers Tower, wolfish blue eyes scanning the landscape around him. The sun is shining brilliantly overhead and there are no clouds in the sky. It doesn't reflect his true emotions at the moment but he lets it shine anyway, not one to rest his burdens on the innocent humans of Midgard. In his mind he can hear Clint's story over and over, like a dismal reminder of a thrilling yet tragic drama. He thinks that he despises the father of Agent Barton, unable to compare the pathetic mortal to Odin. 

_Blind loyalty._

How did one plead blind loyalty to one of the greatest and most powerful beings in the whole Universe? 

The proof was all there, Thor rationalized, his lips twitching in deep concentration. Odin was the _Allfather_ and a great leader, championing the development of one of the most successful planets in the Galaxy. Asgard had grown under him and so had its people. Not even the great prophecy of Ragnarok seemed to be a threat because whatever threats there were, Odin had taken care of them all. Aside from his own rule, his role as a father had always been just as rewarding. Thor grew up with a sense of worth and honour. He learned how to be a well-poised and respected God. Hel, he'd been _trained_ by the great war general himself! 

Everything Thor knew, he owed to Odin. 

So it seemed a mightily difficult task to think of the man now, as an evil and heartless warmonger. One who had stolen the heir of Jotunheim as leverage against Laufey in the war; and one who had kept Loki as a son only to lie to him for centuries. His friends didn't seem to understand that defying Odin was almost the same as erasing everything he'd thought he ever knew. 

It was hard, he guessed; trying to look at something differently when he'd believed in something else his entire life.

Another thought crosses his mind, fleeting but it still leaves an imprint in his head. 

_Loki must have felt the same way... believing he was Asgardian royalty and then being told that he was something else completely..._

A gust of ice cold wind shakes him out of his reverie, long enough to realize that this was the first time he'd ever listened to his mind, instead of his heart. It took a lot of strength, courage and humility for the Asgardian King to admit that to himself but he couldn't help it if he tried. 

Thor had never been a thinker or one to analyze strategy. He'd always been steadfast and vicious in battle- like his father. Consequences and ramifications usually escaped his mind when the sound of his blood rushing in his ear was too loud. He was young and hungry for conflict and a chance to prove himself to Odin. Often times, even Loki fell victim to his proud declarations, his little brother at times forgotten and hidden behind his broad shadow. 

His cheek twinges at the thought of the many times he'd shut Loki down because his pride had been hurt. 

_But... he was a Frost Giant..._

He shook his head, as if actively trying to shake that stubborn voice out of his head. Like he had to constantly remind himself that he was there not to judge but rather to find answers. 

"You're either mad, _or dim."_

The seriously irritated voice of Leifet echoes against the cold cave walls surrounding him. Thor startles with a grunt as he brandishes Mjolnir on reflex. Electric blue eyes meet blood red ones for at least a minute before he notices the other giants encircling him, hissing and growling threateningly. It was hard standing there and not being able to do anything but stare. 

But Thor had promised himself that he'd be open-minded and that he'd listen to what the Jötuns had to say. 

This was about finding Loki; changing perspectives. Like Clint said. 

"Leifet- I come before you, not as your en-" 

"The little runt is not here. You have wasted your time." The Jötun King interrupts, staring down at Thor as if he were nothing but an annoying insect in his periphery. 

Thor can feel his blood begin to boil as he straightens his stance, electric eyes flaring at the frost giant. His wrist twitches idly, unused to the absence of the weight of Mjolnir. It had taken him a great deal of self-control and humility to enter Jotunheim without his hammer in hand but, now he felt that it was a move he deeply regretted. At least He had the reassurance that he could cal upon Mjolnir whenever he needed it. 

He takes a steady step back as if to silently plead his innocence. 

"How did you know that I was searching for Loki?" He inquires, eyes narrowing at the hungry-looking Selekenir who prowls close by with an ugly snarl etched permanently on his face. 

"Let us just agree that keeping astride of the events in Asgard is not a simple hobby but rather a necessity." Eleifir answers evenly, stepping bravely up to the thunder God. 

Thor growls. "Then you must also know of Loki's true parentage. That must have come as quite a shock." He shoots back, hyper-aware of the Frost Giants gathering around them. They were some of the most dangerous apex predators in all of the nine realms, so it wasn't out of habit that Thor had to keep watching over his own shoulder. 

"Of course not. Unlike Odin and the throne of Asgard, the house of Laufey holds no dark secrets and lies. We have always known of father's missing heir." Leifet answers, his cocksure attitude matching Thor's measure for measure. 

"I don't believe it for a second." Thor argues, "If Laufey knew his last born was stolen, why didn't he make haste to Asgard to fight for it?" 

"Odin threatened to kill the runt!" Selekenir hisses, his red eyes flashing with unbridled fury. 

Thor cannot help the way his breath catches in his throat at that. He blinks as if trying to wake from some horrid nightmare only to fall victim to his morbid thoughts once more. 

_Would Odin have really killed a baby?_

Regardless of its heritage- Jötun or otherwise- Loki would have been an innocent baby at the time. No sin yet staining his precious soul. 

_Did his father really use a baby as leverage against Laufey in the war?_

He thinks back to all the times he'd spent with Loki at his side, both of them growing up with each other, never leaving the other's side. He recalls studying in his chambers at night while Loki slept beside him. And then when Loki had started his own studies after reaching the appropriate age to learn magic. Frigga had always been with him, teaching him and nurturing him every step of the way. But then Thor remembers that feeling he used to get whenever Odin yelled at his little brother too loudly, or when they both got into trouble for rough-housing when they were supposed to be training and Loki got the worse of the punishment. He remembers seeing Loki try his best to please the man he would grow to resent; and never doing so. 

_Was it all because Odin knew of Loki's true parentage? And that he'd never truly cared for the child of a Frost Giant who'd become nothing but a mere stolen relic of war?_

"My father would never do such a th-" He starts but falters at Leifet's cantankerous cackle. 

"Stupid little fool you are. The Frost Giants possessed one of the greatest armies in all of the nine realms, why would Laufey hold back from an all out war with Asgard?" 

Thor frowns, his voice nothing but a breathless whisper. "Because Odin stole the Jötuns heir from him..."

"Well, that's just _part_ of the puzzle." Selekenir goads on. 

Thor glares up at him, angry and frustrated. He's never been good at solving puzzles- that was Loki's forte.

"What do you mean?"

Eleifir snarls. "Loki was Laufey's beloved son. The anomaly in his coding but he loved his little Frankenstein anyway."

"Frankenstein?" 

"Eleifir reads a lot, don't mind him." Leifet interrupts, "But he is correct. Loki was a runt, too small and too weak to carry on the throne. But Laufey loved the little monster anyway and Odin took him away. You could imagine how father grieved after that." 

The Jötun King shoots up from his throne and begins descending from the icy tiers towards Thor. 

"I was the perfect King, the ultimate successor of the throne of Jotunheim but father could never get over the loss of Loki to see that. His grief isolated all three of us, and we became nothing but mere satellites in his eyes. Day and night he mourned- scrying into Loki's chambers was not enough-" 

"He was spying on Loki?" Thor demands righteously but Leifet merely flicks his wrists carelessly. 

"At the solstice commune, father begged Odin to return his son but the old fool refused. That was the last straw I guess; father deserted the crown after that and had himself killed in a battle at Guelph. His body is interred right here in this very throne room." 

Thor involuntarily scans around the room as if he were expecting to see some great headstone with an inscription made in gold fit for a King. Instead, he makes note of the small shard of pure white ice coming up from the ground like a frozen hand. 

"Mind not the simplicity of the markstone; for it is even more grand than he deserved." Leifet growls under his breath. 

Thor feels a sudden wave of... _sympathy?_ break over him, sobering and sad. Laufey, despite being his father's mortal enemy had always been this larger than life being that Thor had grown to both fear and admire. Perhaps even envy but his Asgardian pride would never allow him the humility. 

"And Loki? He was here. Wasn't he?" Thor finally says, his question softened with the lack of bite. Electric blues meet fiery red and for the first time in a long time, he felt a oneness with his enemies. 

Whether he accepted it or not, he and Loki had been raised as brothers. They _were_ brothers, in some twisted, ironic turn of events and... he had to acknowledge that fact. And being as close to Loki as he had been, Thor suddenly felt dangerously connected to Laufey and his offspring. So many secrets and hidden truths Odin had concealed from them both... how could the Allfather be trusted after all this? 

"He came to us, seeking asylum... a home... seeking mercy." Selekenir answers with a grunt, baring his teeth. Thor frowns, not understanding the sting piercing through his chest at Selekenir's words. 

"Where is he?" He demands, his voice shaking with an unforseen emotion. 

"Halfway across the universe if he's smart." Selekenir shoots back. 

"Or dead, which in either case would be good for, _you_ right?" Leifet snorts obnoxiously. 

"What?" 

"Well, you know, without another heir, all rights to the throne of Asgard will be exclusively under your power. You will rule unchallenged. How fortunate." 

"You didn't grant him asylum. Why?" The God of Thunder demands again, gritting his teeth and about half a second away from summoning the Bifrost.

"Shouldn't that be my question? You chased him out of Asgard like a common criminal. Why should we take in your strays?" Leifet spits mockingly at him. The Thunder God has the decency to look ashamed, the fire in his eyes dying slowly. Now he just looks weary and frustrated. 

"He _is_ your brother, whether you accept it or not. And if you didn't, isn't he a Frost Giant? I thought you were one and the same with your lot?" 

Leifet flares. "He was a baby when he was taken by Odin ergo he is _not_ one of us. I lost father's favour because of that little runt. Having him here would only serve as an insult to my reign. I'll not have it!" 

It's all Thor needs to hear before he finally summons the Bifrost, his eyes warm with an oncoming spill of tears. But he'd be damned if he ever let a single tear drop fall in front of a Frost Giant. A myriad of questions- nay; _screams_ bounce around in his throbbing skull, all of them for the former King resting peacefully in his Odinsleep. 

The Bifrost takes him back to Asgard, right in the middle of Odin's chambers where he lies, unconscious. The first tear slips down his face, creased with worry, fear and uncertainty as he gazes past the golden haze protecting the Allfather. His lips quiver uncontrollably as he opens them up and shuts them again, at a complete loss for words or rational thought. He's angry. He's hurt. And he's confused. 

_How could you do this to me?_

"Loki is gone." 

_How could you do this to him?_

"Leifet told me everything."

 _Why is it that a Frost Giant can tell me the truth but you can't?!_

"You lied." 

_You stole him from his true parents... his home!_

"I banished him- I-" 

The words become choked up and cut off by the raw emotion welling up in his chest and he has to take a step back from Odin's sleeping form, hands braced on his knees as he hunches over, heaving from some sickness that would never make itself known. 

He stumbles and wipes at the bile dripping from his lips. 

"You lied!" He screams, smashing Mjolnir into the wall where the golden panels shatter on impact like fragile glass walls. 

_I wish you were dead instead of mother._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy minhoy

**Author's Note:**

> Hope y'all enjoyed.


End file.
